Pop - Ch.12

 

You are just like your mother, I'm just the same as the others.
Do you believe everything they write in all those magazines?
Stay out of love until you're ready, stay out of it 'cause it scares you.
You'll still find your love outside the public library.

I know it could happen to you.

 

- Shout Out Louds – “Impossible”

 

                “Dad, I’m worried.”

                “Hold on son, I’m putting you on speakerphone. Your mother wants to listen in.”

                “What’s this you’re worried about? You know worrying’s not good for your heart.”

                “I know Mom,” Niv sighed heavily, “it’s Max.”

                “Well what is it son?”

                Niv looked over at Max, still sleeping under the covers of his bed. How could someone he loved be causing him so much pain? Ever since Alekk had left and they moved into his house nothing was the same. Another side of Max had surfaced, the side that he guessed was trying cope around the fact that

Alekk was no longer in their presence. It had to be this way though. He would have done the same thing had it been Alekk in his place.

                “It’s the same,” Niv replied to his father, “every day she stays in bed, still crying sometimes. It’s been a month since the doctor lifted her bed rest orders, but I swear I’ve only seen her out of bed when she uses the toilet or takes a shower.”

                “Is she eating?” asked his mother in concern.

                “Yes.”

                “Well that’s good, then. Just give her some time, Niv. Okay, we have to go.”

                “Yes, don’t worry so much,” said his father, “and just be there for her, son.”

 

 

 

 

                Click.

                Niv walked over to where Max was sleeping. Nothing could have been lonelier than this. It had been almost two months since they had had a normal conversation. He had practically no one to talk to. Just one word, he wished. Just a confirmation that she was going to try – that she would push through this cloud of depression that had caught them so quickly. He knew he had no control over the events that had happened recently, but inside his heart was slowly breaking, and he couldn’t very well do anything to control that either.

                Outside the sky dimmed from its usual bright blue that had shown in earlier months. Autumn was brewing in the air. Niv thought about his situation over and over again in his head. He was supposed to love Max and love his baby. It was such a hard concept to grasp. All he did was try his best to make Max happy enough to see the light in her eyes. Did she even love him anymore? He knew the time would come when he could feel nothing but love. But for now, how could he love when he received no love in return?

 

 

 

                Niv had finally left me after a few minutes. Lately every time he came in I would pretend I was sleeping instead of cry in his presence. I felt so guilty, so wrong to be feeling this way in front of him. I remembered at one time he asked if I did really love him the same I loved – still love – Alekk. I told him that I did. I would have done the same thing if he had left me instead of Alekk, but there was still the huge gaping hole in my heart.

                Half of me was gone it seemed. I was in so much pain. Every day I awoke with heartache. I knew this was the norms of society. Generally it was like this: mother, father, child. You would never typically see a woman with two men she loved to pieces, and the child they would raise together. Relationships like that weren’t meant to work.

                Tears streamed down my face once more as the piercing memory came back – the one where Niv and Wes had to tell me that Alekk would never come back. I couldn’t be in his house anymore. I would perhaps never see him again. How cruel of a world this was that forever I would be ripped apart from someone I love so much. Never to give him a kiss; never to even hold his hand again.

                Every day I lay in bed like this. Sometimes I would get up to stretch my legs. I knew with every passing day however that I was making Niv less hopeful of my professed love for him. In the mornings he would chipper up, bringing me breakfast in bed. But as he would watch diligently over every bite I took, I could see his small smile start to fade.

                “Please don’t give up on me,” I would think to myself. I just needed time, but in my situation time was a limited thing.

                I tried not to think of Alekk, telling myself that if I didn’t think of him I’d soon forget little bits of what resembled him. I hoped that maybe I would get lucky and forget what he looked like, what he smelled like, what his warm skin felt like. However one day I broke that rule, and I think that was what sent me deeper into my trap of depression…

 

                The sound of his house phone ringing awoke Alekk from his midnight daze as he meandered around the living room by himself. Every night he had found himself down here until the early hours of the morning, unable to sleep as much lately. The phone call was a total surprise, and he looked at the screen to see who had called him. Blocked number. Alekk picked answered the call in amusement, expecting some teenager down the street to spout out some comedic prank call.

                “Hello?”

                “Alekk.”

                Her voice stopped him dead in his tracks. It took everything to keep his knees from nearly buckling. He could feel the tears start to well up in his eyes, but fought off the feeling.

                “Hey,” he replied, his voice shaking, “why are you calling so late?”

                A long pause. Then Alekk could hear Max crying in the background. That did it. A few tears coursed their way alongside his cheek. He punched the wall in frustration. Max could have been his, and only a month ago she was in his arms. He quieted his sobbing enough to talk in an even tone.

                “Why are you crying? Is everything okay? Is Niv treating you okay?”

 

                “Yea he is. Why are you talking so quietly Alekk? I can barely hear you.”

                Alekk sighed deeply. Out of all things he would have to explain this.

                “I don’t want to wake anyone.”

                “By ‘anyone’ you mean ‘someone,’ don’t you?”

                There was a slight whine to Max’s voice. Alekk would have preferred a black eye over this, over the disappointment he knew held, over his overwhelming guilt that served no purpose. This was killing him. Her voice brought back all the pain he tried to suppress.

                “Max, I’m trying to move on. This is me trying. I wish she was you, though. Man I’d do almost anything to have you take her place. I want you, Max.”

                “Does she know you’re talking to me?”

                “No, I don’t think so,” Alekk replied, “not that I care, though. Does Niv know you’re talking to me? I don’t want to make him upset.”

                “No, no he doesn’t. I can’t stop thinking about you, Alekk. I don’t think I can move on.”

                “I don’t think we’re meant to, babe. We just have to keep trying. I love you, Max. I should probably go now.”

                Those last words burned through his mind. He didn’t want to go; he never wanted to let Max go. He knew the impact the words would have on Max, on him. It would possibly be their last goodbye. He hated how Max was now sobbing in the background, no doubt trying to collect herself so that she could say something back.

                “I… love you Alekk. Goodbye.”

                Alekk just remained still, staring at the quiet phone now in his hands. In just a moment she had gone. His mind was so consumed in the conversation that he hardly noticed when a pair of slender arms hugged him from behind. He just stood there, not caring what his lack of response would mean.

                “That was her, wasn’t it?” she asked.

                “Yea,” replied Alekk.

                “You’re tired. Come back to bed with me,” Alyssa soothed, grabbing both of his hands. She held them for a while, staring into his eyes as if expecting him to look back at her. But Alekk just stood there, emotionless. She let go, her eyes still searching for some sign that he knew she was here. That she existed. When her face finally dropped was when Alekk somewhat responded. He grabbed her hand, and the two gently walked to his bedroom.

                “I’ll make you some chocolate chip pancakes in the morning. I know those are your favorite,” smiled Alyssa softly. It was a fake smile, but she was grasping at straws. She wanted Alekk to be happy again. She remembered a time when Alekk was completely happy, when he would playfully smirk at her. She used to hold his happiness all those years ago – now Maxine did. Alyssa wondered if it really was this difficult for Alekk to perhaps fall in love with her again.

                As if reading her mind, Alekk finally spoke.

                “You know I don’t love you, right?” he said as he dressed into his pajamas.

                “I know.”

                Alyssa climbed in bed, the rest of the night staring at the ceiling and wondering why this Maxine was so much more special than she could ever be.

 

                I didn’t think I would ever be able to get Alekk out of my mind. It was impossible not to think of him for a second. But then there came the day when I would feel a love more powerful than I had ever felt before, so powerful that it could allow me to push Alekk to the edge of my mind. I would always still think about him, but the pain associated with him would dull to almost nothing.

                “Oh my gosh,” I blurted out without thinking. I didn’t expect it this soon, and it felt weird, like a butterfly fluttering. I threw back the covers.

                “You okay?” grumbled Niv, half-awake. Other than speaking he didn’t move an inch. He must have been exhausted.

                “Yea,” I whispered, “I’m just going to the bathroom. I think I drank too much water yesterday.”

                “Mhm.” He instantly fell back asleep.

I tip-toed over to the bathroom, the floor feeling cold against my bare feet. I flicked on the light and walked over to the mirror, running my hand over my stomach. I had gotten bigger, and didn’t even notice with all my time spent in bed lately. I felt the fluttering again and held my hand there. A wave of emotions surfaced. My heart was beating so wildly – I could laugh or cry, or both. I noticed Niv in the mirror’s reflection. The look on his face said it all.

                “Niv, I could feel it move.” As predicted, I did end up laughing and crying at the same time. I was a huge sappy mess. Niv smiled genuinely and walked over to me, placing his hand over mine. He looked at me with those beautiful blue eyes, full of love.

                “My baby,” he whispered, kissing my stomach. And I think I knew then that my world was complete.

 

                Niv sat on the couch with Max, who was resting her feet, hoping the swelling in her ankles would go down. He wasn’t sure for Max, but to him the months had passed by so quickly. His son or daughter would arrive only two months from now, and Max was really doing great. But for some reason, they still had trouble with picking out names.

                “Gosh, you’d think we’d have this figured out by now,” laughed Max.

                “Right?” replied Niv, “Okay, girl names. Give ‘em to me.”

                Max smiled.

                “I like the names Camille, Rachel, and Georgiana.”

                “Georgiana, I like that one,” Niv blurted.

                “Are you sure?” Max asked suspiciously, “we always have trouble picking names.”

                “No I like it. I can see our daughter having that name.”

                Max wanted to argue the truthfulness of that statement, but couldn’t. Niv’s kind blue eyes stopped her mid-thought.

 

                “Okay, a boy name,” sighed Niv, smiling at the fact that I still didn’t have a comeback for what he said previously. I gave him a smirk.

                “Chris P. Lettuce,” I said jokingly.

                “Oh, nice! As if we won’t have to worry enough about keeping the girls off of him – thanks to your genes – but now we’re going to have to worry about them eating him, too.”

                I was still smirking, hints of laughter escaping. Niv leaned over and gave me a quick kiss, one I wanted to last longer. He was just so handsome. It wasn’t fair.

                “Okay, what are your ideas then?” Suddenly Niv’s light-hearted smiling face turned quite serious. I could tell he had been thinking about this for a while.

                “Just one. I like Everett.”

                It was a name that I couldn’t get over. All I knew was this this HAD to be the name I picked if I had a son.

                “It’s perfect,” I smiled.

 



 

 

                Unknowingly to Max, Niv had been keeping in touch with Alekk lately. With each day he got more excited because it meant a day closer to meeting his son or daughter. But with each day he also became more worried. What if his heart couldn’t handle the whole experience? What if he was in the delivery room and he suddenly had a heart attack? As far as he knew, having a baby was a very stressful process, and his nerves were getting to him. He wanted to be there for Max when the time would come, but he also didn’t want to chance dying before he became a father.

                Alekk agreed to stay within the neighborhood, frequently calling Niv to make sure he was okay, to remind him of his deep breathing exercises – anything that would help his heart.

                “I mean, I wouldn’t mind if there was a doctor there and all, but what if Max was by herself? What if it was just us? People do that sometimes, you know.”

                “Niv, it’ll be okay. You guys have the hospital nearby, just take her there when the time comes. I doubt you guys will be by yourselves.”

                “Alekk, I’ve seen shows. Sometimes people have kids in vans on the freeway. You know, this one couple got into a car accident on the way to the hospital. What if that happens to us? What if something like that happens?”

                “Then you call me, Niv,” Alekk replied, “you guys won’t be by yourselves, I promise.”

 



 

 

                Niv ran his hands over Max’s swollen stomach. He was playing hide-n-seek. Everywhere his hand would touch, the baby would kick soon after. He smiled as he saw a tiny outline of a foot.

                “Come on baby, any day now.” It had been two days since the due date, but he and Max didn’t dare step foot outside the house. It had been a week since the paparazzi surprisingly found out about their location. Max was as popular as ever.

                “Be careful of what you wish for,” she warned, “do you want me to fix you something for lunch?”

                Niv nodded in reply. He couldn’t help but look at Max. She looked so beautiful. She opened the fridge before suddenly grabbing onto the counter nearby, clutching it for support. Her face was full of agony.

                “Niv! Niv…,” she laughed slightly, “I think my water broke.” Niv’s head started to spin.

                “Oh my gosh, okay. Um, I’ll go call the hospital. And I’ll start the car.”

                He said what he was going to do, but now he was frozen in place. Move, he told himself. One leg at a time he started to move, but he couldn’t keep his eyes off of Max, who was still in pain.

                “Niv it’s too late,” Max gasped, “I don’t think the baby wants to wait any longer.”

 



 

 

                Niv panicked. His worst nightmare was coming true. He picked up his phone and dialed the only number that stuck in his brain at the moment, the number of the only person he knew who could help. Alekk.

                “Hello?” Alekk answered in his usual calm voice. Niv usually admired how calm his was, but at this moment he didn’t believe anyone was allowed to be calm, especially in this situation.

                “Alekk I need your help. It’s Max. She’s having the baby and we’re in my house, and we can’t go. And I don’t think I can take this. I’m going to die, Alekk. I’m going to die.”

                “I’m on my way,” replied Alekk, “but listen to me Niv. You can do this. Breathe. You have to be there for her – she needs you. You have to do this. You’ll be okay. Just breathe, you’re going to be a dad, Niv.”

                “Okay,” Niv gasped. He started doing his deep breathing exercises.

                “Okay, I can do this. Can you call for an ambulance?”

                “Sure,” replied Alekk, ending the call.

 

                Niv rushed back over to Max, who was now safely on the floor. She looked at him apologetically.

                “I don’t think I can do this, Niv. What if I’m like my Aunt Karen? What if something happens?”

                He realized he wasn’t the only one completely clueless to this sort of thing. He knew now that he couldn’t let Max down. He had to encourage her as best as possible.

                “You can do this, Max. Think of how beautiful he or she is going to be. I’m going to be right here. I won’t ever leave you.”

 



 

 

                The traffic allowed Alekk to arrive at the hospital later than he intended to be. By the time he stepped foot in their room, Niv was already holding his baby who was wrapped in a blanket. Niv was swaying slightly, rocking the baby to sleep. His eyes were glued to his child.

                Max was laying in the hospital bed, no doubt still heavily exhausted. She smiled amusingly at Niv, a smile full of love. Her eyes were tired, and as Alekk walked further in the room, they caught his. She gave him a light smile, before looking back at Niv. She quickly started falling asleep.

                “A boy,” Niv whispered as Alekk approached.

 

 

                “What did you name him?” Alekk asked.

 

 

                “Everett.”

                Niv had the biggest grin on his face. Alekk had never seen him so happy before. He remembered everything Niv had sacrificed when he was younger because of his failing heart.

                “You never thought you would make it this far, did you? It never occurred to you that this would happen in your lifetime, that you would become a father.”

                “Not in a million years.”

                Alekk was happy for Niv, he really was. It was this moment that made his music career worth it. Niv’s happiness.

                “Well then you better like your place in life right now… you’re number five on the transplant list.”

 

END OF CH.12